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Literature Text
Sung to the (abrupt) tune of Spongebob Squarepants theme
Roy: Are you ready, troops?
Peoples: Yes, Lt. Colonel Mustang!
Roy : I can't hear you!
Peoples: Yes, Lt. Colonel Mustang!!!!
Roy : Oh! Who's a shorty shrimp bean sprout that you can't see with your eye?
Peoples: Edward Elric!
*music scratches, record is broken*
Ed: WHO YOU CALLING A MICROSCOPIC BEAN SPROUT ORGANISM THAT YOU CAN'T SEE UNDERNEATH A HIGH POWER MICROSCOPE?
*sounds of an epic fight/surprise attack heard in the background while the Peoples run away in terror*
-----
Sadly, this song was unable to be continued due to the destruction of all our equipment. That, and Mustang was beaten to a pulp.
Roy: Are you ready, troops?
Peoples: Yes, Lt. Colonel Mustang!
Roy : I can't hear you!
Peoples: Yes, Lt. Colonel Mustang!!!!
Roy : Oh! Who's a shorty shrimp bean sprout that you can't see with your eye?
Peoples: Edward Elric!
*music scratches, record is broken*
Ed: WHO YOU CALLING A MICROSCOPIC BEAN SPROUT ORGANISM THAT YOU CAN'T SEE UNDERNEATH A HIGH POWER MICROSCOPE?
*sounds of an epic fight/surprise attack heard in the background while the Peoples run away in terror*
-----
Sadly, this song was unable to be continued due to the destruction of all our equipment. That, and Mustang was beaten to a pulp.
Literature
Roy Mustang - Spongebob Theme
COLONEL ROY MUSTANG
To the tune of the Spongebob Theme Song
Führer: Are you ready kids?
Kids: Yes, sir, Führer.
Führer: I can't hear you...
Kids: YES, SIR, FUHRER!!
Führer: Oooooooh! Who daydreams all day about mini skirts?
Kids: Colonel Mustang!
Führer: Arrogant and charming and such a flirt!
Kids: Colonel Mustang!
Führer: If fire and flames sound awesome to you...
Kids: Colonel Mustang!
Führer: Enlist in the army for something to do!
Kids: Colonel Mustang!
Führer: Ready?
EveryBody: Colonel Mustang! Colonel Mustang! Colonel Mustang!
Führer: Colonel.... Mustang!!! Haha.
Literature
Edward Elric's 'Short' Rants
"Who did you say was small like a grain of rice and doesn't show up in your eyes?!"
"Who did you say was a super-ultra short kid?!"
"Who did you call an ultra hyper midget?!"
"Who did you call miniature size?!"
"Who did you call a shorty who's so small that he's barely visible and hard to target?!"
"Who did you call a shorty that has to be looked through a magnifying glass to actually be seen?!"
"Who are you calling a bean?!"
"Who are you calling a super midget that makes you want to step on him?!"
"Who are you calling a tiny bug that escapes the wrath of a shoe because he's so small that he fits in the grooves and can't get squashed?
Literature
20 Things Ed Would Never Do
20 Things Edward Elric Would Never Do
1. Go to Roy's house and ask if he wants to buy Girlscout Cookies
2. Tell Al that he hates him
3. Call Roy and ask him if his refrigerator is running
4. Yell "I LOVE MILK!"
5. Hit Winry in the head with a wrench (for a change)
6. Claim that he's Furer
7. Dance ontop of Roy's desk singing the "I'm a Goofy Goober" song from Spongebob the Movie
8. Rip off his shirt and starts to act like Armstrong
9. Accept it when someone calls him small
10. Run around in circles screaming "I WANNA BE A PIRATE I WANNA BE A PIRATE I WANNA BE A PIRATE!!"
11. Say "I'm a pretty girl!"
12. Belly Dance
13. Try out
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holy shitballs this is perfect